Lead Me to the Lonely

I use to think that I only needed being saved by God once, but as I grow older I tend to find that I need saving more now just as much as I did before.It is a misconception I have let myself believe for several years that since I have officially been 'saved' means that I am better than my fellow sinners, or more accurately the ones I see struggling with believing at all. I unjustly judge people this way and I say I am sorry so many times I wonder if I will ever truly change. I become so self righteous that it is hard to see myself properly in the mirror. I'm ashamed to say that I have believed my own mind in thinking that I am better than my friends that are struggling. When I go to talk to my brother and mother about how it is just too hard to see the good in these people because they annoy me with the way they carelessly say things or just are, they remind me that God came for the lonely. I forget that I too was lonely and a sinner before God came and found me and called me His own. Jesus Christ came for sinners, for the brokenhearted, for the lonely, for the ones who do not get it right, for the ones who could care less if they lived another day, for the starving and thirsty, for the widow and orphan, for every evil that it would be made good through Him. It's amazing that such a pure love would allow itself to become broken and spat upon just to be with us.To be friends with us forever and ever into eternity. I can never comprehend such a love and so I try not imagining it at all, which tends to make me think that God's love is more subdued than what the bible says. Mind you I can be very wrong about this, this is just my perception and it is willing to change with some patient guidance.

Anyways, my point is that Christ came for every sinner and not for the perfect. I don't know why I thought that I was getting somewhere close to perfection when I am still so far from it, yet I have the audacity to judge a sinner. It's like God has been telling me to remove the plank of wood in my own eye before I can get the splinter of wood out of my brother's eye. Just being able to see myself as a sinner still trying to walk the straight and narrow seems to be so hard for me to visualize and yet that is what I really am. Sure I have been redeemed with precious blood and I am made a new creature in Him. That does not give me any excuse to judge no matter what I feel like. It just doesn't.

I have been told by my parents that it is better to assume the best in another person than the worst, even though I heed it only when I have the time to think deeply about
it. I know now that even though I want some of my 'friends' to know Christ and be saved personally, I need to ask God to save me right now and in this moment. I don't know why it takes so long to get through my thick skull that I am just as bad, maybe worse in some cases, than the people I judge. My prayer right now is that I would see more of my need for Thee versus filling some of that spot with the need to put down others to make myself feel better. I want Him to lead me to the lonely and have a good conscience in saying that not only do I want my peers to be saved, but I want to be saved with them. I know I am repeating myself a lot but I can't get over how simple this sounds! It's almost ridiculous!I pray that my eyes will be opened more to seeing my fellow man through God'eyes not my own. It is a beautiful thing to truly see some one as God created them to be- a marvelous, one of a kind, creature with unsurpassed love for its Creator. I have been encouraged to fall in love with God over and over again. Hopefully, this time I will not get it right but still not get too under it that I forget to try.

"You're never a failure until you fail to try..." - Jill Wolfe


*please pray for my mom that God would heal her body and this infection that is spreading throughout it will be washed away. She is having bad cramps and wants to throw
up even though she doesn't have that much in her stomach. She is on the fifth round of antibiotics and this one is the roughest on her stomach.*